foreword
ぜんかい -- ゼンカイ
no longer yearning. what have we not done before?
"the world is really but the stage - create the most fulfilling play"
If you're a thief, master the art of thievery.
A psychotic mind leaves no room for regrets.
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Zheng Kai
01.11.1989
CHS - AJC
RevoAct
AJChoir
1st Tenor
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footnote
© Copyrights:
Original layout
Content & Images
Chok Zheng Kai, 2008
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Saturday, December 24, 2005
I'm actually blogging just after i came back from malaysia. anyway, it was fun, esp with cousins. and i was satisfied with those stuffs i bought too. it brightened things up alot. but there was one flaw. dunno why but ever since i have been to japan, i am really sensitive to service. i will take special notice to a shopkeeper's standard of service and everything else. its weird but because my trip to japan has enlightened me alot about service. it was amazingly impressive there. so impressive that my standard of good and bad service has changed dramatically. anywae, i was really pissed at some of the service of the ppl there la. they r like trying to earn money then charge extra those kind. i used to ignore them and just continue being ignorant of them, but then recently i get the growing feeling of disgust against them. dunno y also.
anywae other stuffs has been almost perfect. i came back on xmas eve, and tomorrow is christmas le. even have to attend a xmas party and i have not even bought a present. gt a present exchanging event on tuesday too. watched narnia in msia too. and they open on 8 dec lor. everything there is like faster than sg de. so imba. haha. its quite nice la. wah tt lucy is de smallest but most powerful im my opinion lol. anywae, gt to go back to rushing le. dunno y even in hols also need to live life with such utter rush. lol. its like wake up then need to quickly do this, do that. esp now the hols ending le. and chris, congrats can go aj le. now its like gt more ppl can go aj le. but miracles still must happen. esp on xmas. we wish.
hmmm.. some ppl said maple becoming boring le. and i heard tim just gt his new com. does tt mean tt its only a matter of time before we all switch to the guild wars which we have been talking about since ages ago? i dunno too. life is sometimes so unpredictable that i find difficulty catching up with it. hmm.
ending quote: "Now I know where I truly lie."
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Monday, December 19, 2005
hmmm. when im typing this entry im actually also PQing. lol. anyway, i just came back from teck ching's bday party not long ago. well, there is nothing to blog about just that i watched a very nice movie (wad i think) called Timeline on dvd like yesterday. i dunno why but even though its not exactly impressive, i like the plot. lol. as i mentioned, i have been watching movies all the way when im at home. coz tt time my com also spoilt then cant play anything, so no choice got to let my bro play then i go select some dvds to watch lor.
so there are still some left for me to watch. and also, i read in the recent BIG 8 days mag that The Promise is like having a 1-and-a-half star rating. thats again. shocking. even more a disppointment than aeon flux? lol. anyway, i havent watched that show but tim wanna watch it to 'see how sucky it is' again, and im supposed to treat him. coz tt time he was the one who waked me up or else i wud be late for my o level a maths paper and probably i would have failed it and probably i wud have failed o lvls and probably committed suicide or something. anything, pt is tt is a long story and anywae i owe him somthing.
okay, after typing so long, apparently we still haven got in. probably we gt no luck with the AC. haix. we'll have patience and keep on waiting anywae. so well, the holidays are like gonna reach its limit le and we all have to embrace the end, or shud i say the start of the future le?
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Saturday, December 17, 2005
yea im feeling much better now. i really wanna thank anything that happened during the last few hours for this to be possible. i was playing maple the whole time just now.. and that's rare. coz i haven been logging in and died 4 times while afk-ing yesterday. so wow, i didnt have much determination to level up but hey, i did it. now im level 24. -_-. lol. anyway, as i was playing with them, i was like: oh no.. are we gonna play like tt forever? or is this time one of the last few times we'll be together playing..
oh yah, and i tell u, its a very nice feeling when u r playing a nice guy and you r actually appreciated. coz i was in this cave when some stranger in maple started shouting for help. apparently he was dying and he needed potions. so i gave him 15 orange ones for free and tt apparently saved his life. i didnt ask for any money and he repeatedly thanked me for it. sometimes its just so nice that there are actually good, kind, humane and appreciative ppl out there who actually cares for the existence of others. lol. and then doug and i went on dropping lotsa stuff for tim who needed those stuff for something. he was pleasantly surprised. and doug, i totally understand wad u meant by got 'ai xin' or not. well, u have really been a gd example in selflessness. to think i tot i was altruistic enuf in the past. haha.
anywae my mind was suddenly relieved when mun kiat started chatting with me abt my previous entry. he actually knew fully what i felt. well, afterwards, as usual, swens smsed me abt it. swen, if u r reading this, coz anywae u will, pls noe that u never fail to comfort me whenever such things happen. and btw, that sms helped alot. thanks. thanks. thanks. okay, so now, im like off maple le and im relieved. relieved not because there was nothing and i was worried for nothing. but because human emotions are inevitably expressive at times, and whatever happened has really calmed it down. yah. just be happy. back to my theory and motto for life. that's it. as simple as it is. :p
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Friday, December 16, 2005
Well. i seriously do not know how i should start this entry. a hell lot of things ran thru me like a bullet train today, although things may not seem like it. the moment i woke up, awaken by a dozen calls all ringing around my head, it seems endless torture. the first thing i had to do today was to check my PAE posting. and the first call i answered was from doug, nt something i was actually expecting, really. he told me he got posted to a sch. a sch tt was unexpected. so i tot i would be in tt sch too, since he told me others too got posted there. and then, i checked mine and here came the second unexpected twist. mine posting was the expected one. it was clear then, when i read the posting, that there was something more to it.
nothing ends just like that. apparently, the herd got split between 2 schools. and then tim called me and told me something horrible, something cursed. no no no! i wasnt just going to let that happen. such things have came before me and i have endured them for like a thousand years, passed it on and moved on, but no! nothing like dat is going to take place, and worse, be authorised by me. the words he spoke, exactly wad i had feared throughout the day. i ended up having to mask these thoughts by watching perhaps love with my mum at ps. it was a good show which covered me up a little. and then fate has it that immediately when the credits scroll on, xc called to talk abt PAE again. apparently he went ice skating the morning, no wonder no oen seemed to be able to contact him. i was really touched. i dunno why, it has nothing to do with me, but ur passion of something touches me.
then worse things absolutely not related to that started happening before me again. and i had no choice but to shut myself by blasting my ipod. the songs i played were 'a thousand words' and 'melodies of life', both only played when there was sorrow present deep within me, where there was a tingle of fear, a fear that the sadness would come alive and overcome me. i was almost paralysed by it.
yes, and i end up right before u now, blogging about what i feel. it could just pass as any ordinary day, and i may have well forgotten about such an experience in a matter of days. but all that matters is that today i felt something. something dead that probably came alive again, and by that i dun really mean it to be anything good. it was sort of awaken. and it is my duty to put it back to sleep. and it is ur job to ensure its once again in its endless deep slumber. do ur job too, pls. because im scared.
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Thursday, December 15, 2005
okay, today is really quite boring. i woke up at about 1230pm and there was absolutely nothing in my mind i looked forward to today. it appears that these days, the herd has no activities anymore, and i know why. someone even said it has become a modern league of nations. weird. hmm, basically because very few herd members are interested in DOTA and LAN le, thats why we seldom plan such trips. actually since the beginning, the herd was actually subconsciously formed because of the shared interest in LAN gaming. now, with all these inconsequential to most of us, it is only inevitable that we dont plan trips. so its not like we are drifting away, its just tt we wanna rest for a while.
talking about drifitng away, its really a very sad fact. i noe many people noe its inevitable tt frens will drift away, esp when they change school. but i just dun wanna spell that fact out so blatantly. its not tt is bad or anything, in fact, i havent felt anyone drifting away yet. but its just tt i dun like hearing it and i would rather leave it to nature to decide upon the fates of all relationships in the present. sometimes mutual drifting can be good for both parties. really.
anyway, i have put up a tagboard le. first time using something else other than 'tagboard' itself. now using cbox. basically coz i went to swen's blog and saw his cbox, so i just got it. lolx. i wanted to watch more dvds today after blogging. but i guess maybe i have no time le. because doug just called me and asked me to go bugis with him.
btw, everyone has been telling me to watch lord of the rings. it all started because i sort of insulted the show in front of swens and mebbe some others. LOL. sry la, i only watched the 2 towers and i forgot all abt it le, so of course i wasnt exactly impressed with it tt time. it appears its a show you either love or hate, and unfortunately for me, most people around me just simply love the show, so i guess i got to watch the 3 dvds all over again so i could comment on the show with more knowledge of it.
swen said my song at the previous inuyasha blog was nice, so i put it up here again anywae. lol. i could be flying off somewhere again soon. hmm. and anyway i think the JC posting results are gonna be out tomorrow on fri. so yah.. interesting period of time again.
one thing abt the hols is that my mind and body is not feeling enough things to make me feel life is life. precisely because i dun go to sch, so i dun get to meet many ppl le, and so i dun meet gd and bad extremes as often as i do in the past. in fact, in the past i had so much extreme ups and downs in my life that i had no time to blog about it. -_-. so perhaps its time i bring myself forward to experiment more abt life. too see more things in perhaps, many other different ways.
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Wednesday, December 14, 2005
This is my new blog. Forget all the rest. Guess what, i forgot both my user and the password and thats why i ended up here. Anyway, delete your links for the previous blogs. I have decided to start blogging for like the dunno how many times le. nvm. this is the first entry anywae.
well, the past few days i have been desperately trying to get myself not to feel bored. so other than going ice skating and to the drama chalet that the CHS and TP ppl organised, i practically kept watching movies all the way. i watched like king kong and aeon flux at the cinemas and the bourne supremacy, the jacket, ice princess, dracula 3000 and angel of death on dvd. so of course most of them suck. lol. like dracula 3000 and angel of death and mebbe a bit of the jacket. king kong was gd but it was so long. guess that's just peter jackson's style. aeon flux, im rather speechless at it. disappointed la. then the rest was ok/gd. almost watched pride and prejedice too. haha. so late and i was not in the mood for romance thats y. well, anyway anyone can go to mr edwin heng's blog to read about his interesting review on that show. lol
mon's ice skating was very very very fun. it was, in fact, enlightening to a certain extent. this was because i brought my herd there and many of them had never skated b4. so it was sort of a first-time experience to them. and well, first-times are usually rather unforgettable. apparently, some got quite interested in the sport they want to go again. im rather pleased with that, though of course there is also a casualty - teck ching. yup i think he sprained his wrist while falling. most of them were struggling to keep their balance on the ice. but wow, it was a tremendous improvement for them i would say! ahaha
tue's chalet was interestingly good. anyway i think its all on tze swen's blog so im not gonna repeat le. i went off early somemore. went to tiffany's hse to collect the dvds but realise most in chinese lolx. they going japan too. haha. enjoy. travelled almost the whole of singapore in just 3 days. walked home all the way from bishan j8 today with doug too. lolx. aiyah now im so bored and sian no choice but to keep myself occupied with blogging coz he nt here to stay over lol. so used to him staying over le. hmm. went to eat at sakae today too. it was good. brings me back the memories of good food in japan. haha.
oh and btw, in case anyone was wondering what the address of this blog means, it means celestial shadow. dun ask y. lol. it just is. in jap. so 'tenno ie-Shin' just is de short form of The Belief of the Celestial Shadow. see, great improvement in blogging rite!? first time blog so much and so long. cya!
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